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Sexual fulfillment in marriage is recognized as important in both Malay culture and Islam, yet studies have showed that many Malay wives appear to never experience sexual relations as pleasant or fulfilling. When it comes to sex, modern Muslim women who may otherwise feel equal and not subservient to their husbands, may feel less assertive about their rights. There are, of course, numerous Malay women who find sex important and fulfilling in marriage, yet a dominant cultural narrative is that Malay women should be sexually submissive, inside as well as outside marriage.

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Some first wives may, therefore, partly blame themselves and their perceived sexual deficiency for the fact that their husband married a second wife. A common discourse on Malay sexuality portrays men as having consistently strong desires which cannot be suppressed, whereas women are seen as having less consistent, more manageable needs.

Many first wives, it is often argued, have few or no sexual relations with their husband by the time of his second marriage.

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Having regular sexual relations is often cited as a reason why men marry a new wife, even by first wives themselves. Some first wives, who have typically been monogamously married for years before their husbands marry a second wife, might simply not want to have sex with their husbands anymore, a pattern found in polygamous unions cross-culturally.

Some first wives, however, may stop having sexual relations with their husband precisely because he has married another woman. Indeed, a man may humiliate his first wife sexually through polygamy, by implying her inability to satisfy him sexually.

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Few men appear able or willing to do that, however. Sexual jealousy is a staple part of polygamous unions cross-culturally. Polygamy may spell celibacy for Malay women who cannot accept sharing their husband sexually with another woman, particularly if forced into polygamy by husbands marrying second wives without their consent.

Yet lonely first wives, married in name only, may find having sexual relations with other men difficult in a religious and cultural context where sex is acceptable only within marriage.

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Some first wives refuse to remain bound by marriage vows to husbands who have married other women and act on their sexual needs. Rather than divorcing their husbands and losing all support, they may opt for affairs when abroad, where contact is easier and more discrete, or risk local affairs, despite fear of gossip and social ostracism.

Second wives may perceive and experience sexuality in polygamous marriages differently than first wives. Sex may constitute a central reason for some Malay women to marry polygamously, sometimes as a €ślegitimate€ť way of conducting an affair.


Second wives are, in the popular imagination in Malaysia, often accused of marrying because they €śneed a man€ť or €ścrave sex. €ť Particularly divorced or widowed women are considered €śman-eaters,€ť as they used to have legitimate sexual relations in marriage and are considered in special need of resuming them.

Men are similarly seen as marrying polygamously for sexual gratification, but this remains less shocking and more understandable, going back to the €śstrong desires€ť to be satisfied within sanctioned marriage.

Career women, in particular, are assumed to marry as second wives for sex. The sanction against sex outside of marriage applies to all women and men regardless of their marital history or circumstances. Becoming second wives might fit their lifestyles, as engaging in legitimate sexual relations might be the only pressing reason why an otherwise socially and financially independent woman should marry at all.

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Many career women have studied or worked in Western countries, where €śaccess€ť to premarital sex was easier. Sexuality remains a contentious domain for contemporary urban elite Malay women, whatever their marital status.

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Choosing to become second wives in order to have legitimate sex may be an option for some women who feel unable to commit the time or the effort to be full time-wives, yet still crave sex and companionship. Polygamy can be a constructive time-management strategy for women prioritizing independent time for work and own interests, an argument promoted by pro-polygamists around the world.

Many women discover that it is a risky strategy, fraught with potential pain and silent suffering.

  Sex may constitute a central reason for some Malay women to marry polygamously, sometimes as a "legitimate" way of conducting an affair. Traditionally, a Malay women's sexuality should exist only in marriage, and Malay women having difficulty finding outlets for their sexual needs may feel that marriage is their only option for having "legitimate" indiataazakhabar.comted Reading Time: 10 mins   'Rich but lonely' married Malay women seeking men to fulfil their lust. Share: ated: Sep 12, Linda said her husband only looked for her when he wants sex. "Even that comes once a month," she added. Many of these women even went on to justify their act @6inchmalay

Polygamous unions in modern Malaysia, rather than seeing €śhusband-sharing€ť in all cts of marriage, see different wives getting different types of attention. Polygamous husbands who are able to share themselves equally among all their wives certainly do exist. Yet even in such ideal cases, the emotional and contentious nature of shared sexual access to one man can cause grief and conflict among co-wives, no matter how well they seem to cope.

Achieving more satisfying sex lives may be challenging in a Malay cultural context, which generally de-emphasizes sex and sexuality, resulting in lack of communication regarding sexual matters between husbands and wives.

Yet as all cultural forms are malleable and dynamic, sexual sharing will continue to be negotiated in Malay Muslim polygamy. W e bring you perspectives from around the world. Help us to inform and educate.

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We have no paywalls and no ads. In the post-truth era of fake news, echo chambers and filter bubbles, we publish a plurality of perspectives from around the world. Anyone can publish with us, but everyone goes through a rigorous editorial process. So, you get fact-checked, well-reasoned content instead of noise.

Mom Denies Oral Sex Claim by Teen Boy. What ever happened in the - house - April afternoon last year. Sent lurid rumors ricocheting around Prosser Washington. - lost denies she gave oral sex to   Following the recent illicit group chat shenanigans in Singapore, yet another Telegram group - titled Gadis Melayu (Malay Girls) - has taken the Internet by time, it's happening Estimated Reading Time: 2 mins Increasing numbers of school-going Malay teens are engaging in premarital sex despite strong opposition of both the Malay culture and religion (Islam) against sex outside marriage. The main purpose of this study was to explore the experiences of Malay female teens on the reasons for their involvement in premarital sex. The study

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Education Refugee Crisis International Aid Human Rights. ISIS War on Terror North Korea Nuclear Weapons. World Coronavirus Politics Economics Business Culture. Sign Up Support FO Login. We're taught a lot about having sex for the first time - that it's special, that it's not special, that it should be saved, or that it shouldn't be.

Ultimately, the first time you have sex should be on your terms, and whether that means it's a really big and special moment, or it's just another day, that's totally up to you. What we can say for sure is that everyone's first time is different, and a recent hashtag on Twitter shows just that.

  People Are Opening Up About Sex Through #MyFirstTime. "My mom caught me." Before it's happened, our first time having sex can feel like a really big,   Lunch lady arrested after hosting sleepover for teens with porn, alcohol and sex. A school cafeteria worker in Louisiana was arrested after an investigation revealed she hosted a sleepover for   May 09, PM. A year-old Georgia boy has been charged with a felony for allegedly secretly recording a video of two other teen students in the middle of sex in a

MyFirstTime is a collection of people's first times having sex, first kisses, first time masturbating, and much, much more. Some people used the opportunity to make pretty good jokes, while others got real about their feelings on their first sexual encounter.

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But if one thing is clear from the hashtag, it's that there are a lot of different ways to get busy for the first time - and they're all totally valid. View on Twitter. While others seemed to think what happened to them was embarrassing, while it's actually totally normal.

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